Shining - Jaurim

Cement

Today at work, I was watching two people mix cement from its powder form and I was just amazed by the beauty of it. I'm not saying that who sweaty people mixing some powders with water is beautiful, but the concept of cement. As I gazed at them mixing the cement, I thought some thoughts.

My thoughts were this.

Cement can easily be compared to a human. Before it is cement, it is powder. Likewise, before people are adults, they are children, infants, toddlers, whatnot. And once the powder is mixed in with the water and turns into cement, it can never change back but only go ahead and become a sidewalk or whatever. Once you grow up, you can't grow back down. You only get wiser and mature and whatnot. Cement turns from useless powder to useful cement. haha.

Also, in order to become a useful cement, there has to be the right amount of water and powder mixed otherwise, it'd be too dry or too wet to be good for anything. However, there is no EXACT right amount of water or powder, the "right"amount can be pretty broad. So you can raise your kid without a strict guideline. the guidelines might definitely help but they aren't a necessity.

I'm tired of talking about beautiful cement so I'm gonna stop. Oh and I was painting and during break I took a look at the mirror because I like looking at myself and I found three paint dots on my neck forming a perfect equilateral triangle. I have no idea how the paint got there.

Liking Somebody

I realized that when you like somebody, you are blinded by your own vanity or at least I am. When I like someone, I tend to try and observe the person a lot more, stay close to them, whatnot, and when I do, I notice certain things that they do, and I interpret it rather ridiculously. Everything that the person I like does, ends up meaning that they like me. "OH, dood, she likes me because she said hi to me, even though I didn't say anything." and "OH, dood, she likes me because I saw her more than twice today." yeah. Ridiculously but at the moment it freakin' looks like they like me. There's a song by Dem Franchize Boyz called, "Oh I think they like me" and the title sums up my thinkings fairly well. I know this because I liked a couple girls in my days at Oxford and needless to say, I was machine gunned down when I asked them to formal. Imagine me as arrogant as can be because I think that these foos like me. I go up to them with my nose up and say, "hey baby-girl, I'll see you at formal. wear black cuz black looks nice on you. And it looks nice on me too." (This is an over-dramatization. I didn't really say this. May God help anyone who does. I pray for thee if ye do.)

But anywho, I just found out the hard way through trials that girls don't like me because they say "hi" to me and whatnot. I don't even think girls like boys if they're checking them out because that's how we boys roll. Even though I don't check out girls...Anyway, I'm trying to say boys don't like boys even if we're checking them out. If you're confused, we're on the same boat.

All in All, a worship song written by Dennis Jernigan, haha.

All in all, it just sucks to be in love with a girl. So much insecurities and scary times. So much stress and wasted times thinking about it. It's just too much.

BUT...

I heard this, I've never experienced this nor do I plan on experiencing in the next 15 to 25 years, maybe longer, I've heard that once she says yes, it's the best feeling in the world.

There's a movie called Adaptation where a character describes his thoughts on a girl he liked and the girl he liked thought he was disgusting. I'm pretty sure I shared this already but it's ok because it's good. He said that it didn't matter what the girl thought because his love was HIS love and no one can take it away. Not even the girl he loved. Deep. Interesting movie. I wouldn't really recommend it though. hahaha.

I Dream

I had the best dream ever and all I can say is, I love green.

Richardian Pet Peeves

Believe it or not, I have some.

1. Being compared to someone just as insignificant as myself
2. Being tricked
3. People who annoy others for their own amusement

I'm also bothered if I'm manipulated or used without me knowing that I'm being used or manipulated. If I'm manipulated or used and I know I'm being manipulated or used even if the person who is manipulating or using me doesn't know they I know I'm being manipulated or used, then I"m completely fine with it. But if I'm manipulated adn used without knowing, then I feel so insignificant and pathetic. I hope that I'm not being manipulated or used right now. I know if I'm being used in most cases but in the very few I don't know, I'm scared.

Man, I've been thinking about it and I am imagining all this crap and if they were true, then I would hurt a lot. Dang, trusting people just got a whole lot harder for me.

However, there are those few that I wouldn't mind manipulating me without my knowledge because I don't care that they manipulate or use me. That goes both ways. Figure out what those two ways are for yourselves suckas.

New Rice Monkeys Sampler

YAY!!! I finally went and made the new sampler for Rice Monkeys. The song is called World View religion and I'm so proud of it. I need to add the vocals and such but the song is good. I like it. Check it. MySpace.com/RiceMonkeys. I didn't allow it to be open for download because I want you guys to download the full song, not the sampler. Let's see, I need better pictures because pictures are mad important. I also need to find a singer for the chorus of that song.

Richardian Thoughts on The Moment of Truth

The Moment of Truth is a game show where a person is asked a lot of personal questions in front of his/her family and friends and they have to answer truthfully in order to win. They ask questions like, "Would you cheat on your wife if you knew that you wouldn't get caught?" and "Have you ever thought of leaving your husband for financial reasons?" and such crap like that. Anywho, I watched my first episode and I was completely befuddled by the differences in priorities between Me and My Greatness and other petty people.

This particular episode starred a stay-at-home mom who worked as a volunteer fire-fighter and she was asked if she ever shoplifted anything and gave it to her son. She answered yes and the whole audience and family and friends started clapping. I was like, "WHAT?! BURN HER AT THE STAKE!!! SHE'S A THIEF!!! CUT OFF HER HANDS!!!" However, what really got me was the question that got her. The question was, "Do you feel that you are losing sexual attraction to your husband?" She answered, "no." And that was not true. I thought how pathetic is it that sex has that much of an impact on your life that you lie on such a question?" Honestly, I wouldn't really care if my wife lost all sexual attraction to me because sex is not a dominating factor in our marriage. So that show just annoyed me and I left the room constantly telling my dad, who just came into the room asking what the show was, that the show was something "isanghango (weird)."

PostScript. Just in case you're wondering. The dominating factor in my marriage is My Greatness. Muthas.

Pictures of Richard

This post, I decided to post up a grip of pictures of myself so all my little blog-checking fans can find out what my life is like. The photographers are YounJooLee, SarahJoo, and BrianHan so thank them for blessing you all with my pictures. Here are the pictures and I titled AND wrote a little shpill about each picture so enjoy.

These first few photos are in a piece I entitled, Pictures By an Amateur that are Made Beautiful by the Model. The photographer is the famed YounJooLee and she takes decent pictures which I turn into art. I hope you enjoy this first batch.

My Finest Hour
YounJooLee

This is What I Look Like When No One is Looking
YounJooLee

"Ya Talkin' ta Me?"
YouJooLee


The Face of Richard That Only Comes out When a Really Tall Asian Man Gets Him in a Sleeperhold
YounJooLee


Singing a Song to My Beloved
YounJooLee


The Assault with My Invisible Knife Superpower
YounJooLee


The Photographer That Takes The Pictures and The Model That Makes Them Beautiful
YounJooLee


The Sophomores
YounJooLee


I'm Superman with my Little SideKicks Batman and Green Lantern
YounJooLee

The next few photos are in a series I entitled, The Softer Side of Me: The Gangster Side. In these pictures you will see my more gentler, affectionate, and motherly side.

My Name is RicaChu
And I Love You
BrianHan

Throwing Up the Gang Sign
SarahJoo

Throwing Up the Gang Sign II
YounJooLeeGangSign III
RicardoChungo

June 5, 2008

This is the first time my work has been overwhelmingly difficult.

Things People Lost in the Fire

By fire I mean the process of leaving BIOLA. While I'm painting my dorm rooms, there are a number of interesting things that we find.

1. 3 Brassieres
2. Wedding Crashers DVD without the Case
3. Petty Coat
4. 4 Coat Hangers
   
5. A Piece of Paper with MIKE written in the middle of it
6. Cinderalla Video featuring Brandy, Whitney Houston, and Whoopi Goldberg
7. A portrait of a Lion
8. A bunch of feminist calendar clippings
9. A grip of pens
10. The case for The Muppet's Movie without the DVD
11. A shaving razor
12. Toothbrush
13. Nail Clipper
    

So yeah. I stole the Cinderella video.

Nostalgia

There are random times when I just think of all the stupid things I've done like calling other people trash and pagans and such and I just feel really really stupid. I know that it's the past but I can't help but feel that I'm a failure. While I was working I was thinking constantly of the time I called a church girl's friends pagans. I also remembered when I called the catholics "trash" in front of a catholic homegirl. Then when I was waking up, I was thinking of when I practically told a school girl that I didn't really want to visit them in UCSD. These kinds of retarded things I do make me feel like I'm never going to get married because I don't appreciate women as I should. I entitled this post "Nostalgia" because I long to go back and delete all that stuff but life just doesn't work that way. This here is a secret that we boys keep. I can't share my views on girls ever because if we boys shared everything that we really thought about girls, it wouldn't be pretty. But it's not only me, it's every boy in the world. I'm pretty sure that it goes for girls to but still. Now. I have to go to work. I think I'm gonna be late. Remember. Forgive me. and all girls are pretty in some way, shape, or form. Olive Juice.

Richardian Stress

There are very few things that give me stress. At least I'd like to think so.

1. Grades
2. Money
3. Girls
4. Everything After Death

Now that I think about it. These are the exact same things that everybody else in the world stresses out about. so ye.