Rantation

Michael Scott: "How the turn tables."

This quote made me laugh out loud twice.

I wrote a song entitled "The Most Wonderful World You've Seen" and it sounds nice. To me at least. Rebekah is an amazing singer.

I truly realized how much more I enjoy Theology over Biology. I would rather talk about Paedobaptism and Believer's Baptism over Reproduction and Reproductive Organs anyday.

I'm gonna try working out lightly. Pyramid Push-up System. I do 20, then 19, then 18, etc. all the way to 1. It gets really hard around 10.

I'm telling people I'm going to go to Japan for Spring semester next year, but I hope I don't get rejected by the school. It would be sad and embarassing. :(

I wrote this rant because I wanted to share the Michael Scott quote on top. :)

Good day.

Naps

I confirmed my suspicions that my body is physically incapable of having nice comfortable naps. Today, I was in the library on the most comfortable chair and the lighting was perfect and everything. And I only slept four hours so I was a little tired. So I decided to just let go and take a nap. I did. And when I woke up, I had the biggest headache just like every other time I took naps.

I feel replenished but at the cost of a humongous headache. It really bums me out since others take so much joy in their naps, while to me, they are a curse upon my being. Plaguing me with headaches and vertigo. :(

I envy those people who can dilly-dally their time away in the land of dreams while us less-fortunate souls can only fight through the rough reality in a semi-conscious state. :(

But it's fine, I wouldn't trade in my anti-nap self for any other self in the world. :)

Curse you nappers! Anti-nappers unite!

The Deciding Factor on Whether or Not I Should Keep My Mohawk

So, ever since I got my mohawk, I felt cool and I was fully aware of the fact that quite simply, girls don't like mohawks. Still, I was content. But when I was in the process of buzzing my hair, I knew it would be a temporary thing. I knew that I would just cut the rest off in a more conservative manner. However, as I had the mohawk longer and longer, I grew attached to it. It is MY style. It is MY statement to the world that I am not bound by the rules of society and other such things. I am kind of in love with my Mohawk. :)

But I'm going to cut it off. The deciding factor was a comment by a friend of mine. I will not embarass her by mentioning her name in my post but her name was Michelle Park, a freshman at Cerritos Presbyterian Church who attends University of California in San Diego.

The comment went something along the lines of "Oh Richard, You surprise me sometimes."

Now, the intent of the writer is her own, and I have no idea what she meant by that comment, but the impact it had on me was vital in the decision-making process of whether or not I should keep the Mohawk. I thought about what she typed and it struck me that, I just did it, to see what it would look like and never to actually keep it. I did not begin the day thinking, "today, is the day I get a Mohawk." Rather, I did it all spontaneously. All this to say, I was just as surprised as anyone that I got a Mohawk. It was one of those things that you do, and afterwards, you go, "what did I just do?"

I don't know if you have those moments but I do sometimes. So my Mohawk is coming off. Partly because I don't want to scare my little kids at Church, partly because the ladies don't like it, and partly because I miss my side burns. :)

So, farewell, oh sweet Mohawk. Good bye.

The One Saving Grace of "She's the Man" with Amanda Bynes

I watched "She's the Man" and one part that really stuck out to me was when Channing Tatum and guy Amanda Bynes were having a discussion on girls.

For those of you who don't know, She's the Man is a movie based on Shakespeare's Twelfth Night, and it features Amanda Bynes cross-dressing as her twin brother in order to attend a school with a prestigious soccer program because she loves soccer. As a boy student at the school, she falls madly in love with a guy and etc.

So the part that struck me, and I definitely saw the shakespearean influence here, was when Channing rebukes Amanda, or "Sebastian", for always talking like an animal about girls. Whenever "Sebastian" talks about girls, he/she gets really graphic and just obscene. Channing states that he does not like it and tells him/her.

So, the reason why this scene stuck with me is because it reflects the view that women have of men, and that men are not as animalistic as we portray. Amanda (girl) needs to take on the identity of a Sebastian (boy) so she talks like what she THINKS boys usually talk like. This shows that women think men are savage animals that think of nothing but sex and sports. The scary thing is, she does not mind as much as she should. She is not completely repulsed that guys might think that way and she is even willing to accept that side of men.

Thankfully, the good guy Channing Tatum (boy) sets her straight and shows her that guys are a lot deeper than that. Yay! He shows that not all guys are completely immersed with sex and sports and that they think about some deeper issues such as love and fellowship.

So, WOMEN OF THE WORLD! Have higher self-esteem! Don't let guys walk all over you. harharhar. :D

Just know that you deserve a lot more than you might think you deserve and don't sell yourself short. I know girls have this "waiting" mentality so it's a bit harder for the girls but don't rush things and if a guy just doesn't seem right, then wait a little longer for the best guy.

This is tip from Abuelita Ricardo! :) Live strong you youthful kids!

Why Healer is My Second Favorite Hillsong Song

My favorite song is an unnamed song on their new album. Brooke Fraser sang it at the concert and it was so beautiful. Tears almost came out. Sadly, I don't know the lyrics nor the title. :(

Second, I did not like it as much until after the whole controversy surrounding the song and the song-writer, Mike Guglielmucci.

For those of you who don't know, Mike wrote the song to "promote" his faith in God even though he was dying of cancer. The problem was, he didn't have cancer. He had been faking it for like two years.

To me, this ensured a place in my heart for the song. It was obvious that Mike was repentant and that he greatly regretted his actions. Although it would be crazy if God cure cancer,to me, it is much more amazing that God can "heal" Mike's heart and forgive him. Mike, along with every single one of us, broke God's laws and lied and stole and sinned, but God still forgave Mike along with the rest of us. We ought to have died but he showed us mercy. This is all elementary concepts to some of you guys but it is still amazing.

Besides, it puts us in a place where we can't really judge Mike. "Let he who hast not sinned cast the first stone," right? Mike shows us indirectly truly how much greater God really is than we make him out to be. A God so filled with love for us that he would love Mike after his atrocious act is something to admire and yearn for.

So all in all, I still love you Mike and so does God. :)

Besides, we all do atrocious acts in our lives. Even if it doesn't get broadcasted across 6 continents. Spread the love ya'll. <3

Mohawks

Tuesday, I met with Stephanie Ting and asked for a hair cut. She said, "ok." So we went over to Horton Hall and she cut my hair. She cut off a chunk of my sideburns so when it was all done, I ended up with a Bowl Cut. As cool as Bowl Cuts are, I already did it so afterwards, I went over to Ju Kyung Cho and Rui Guo's room to use their buzzer. As I was buzzing my hair, Daros Koding came and decided to buzz his hair as well.

At the end of the day, after hours of not knowing what to do, I decided to get a Mohawk.

It looks like this.


I have to make my face like that. A side affect of getting a Mohawk. Strange. Sadly, It'll probably be gone before people see me. If you are lucky enough to see me, congratulations~ :)

I am so in love with Brooke Fraser

Yes I am.

I went to a Hillsong Concert. FOURTH ROW! WOOHOO! I saw Joel Houston right up in my face and Brooke Fraser also. She is so beautiful. I like Hillsong a lot more now. haha. I saw Heffy Kim and it was super exciting. My voice died and resurrected several times that night. I could not sing a single Brooke Fraser song. So high. I enjoyed the experience extremely. Props to Youngman for the tickets. Amazing skills of a man.

I LOVE HER~! :D I had like the biggest smile on my face. I think it's the biggest recorded smile in the face of the earth. My muscles were at its limits. It looked like this.

That day, my jaws hurt from smiling so much. I did not know my mouth or face was capable of such a happy face. :) That's the free shirt I got from UCLA.

We were on the fourth row and we were making fun of the people on the first, second, and third row because they had fold-up steel chairs while we had the compfy built-in chairs. But I greatly underestimated the first to third row because they grabbed ALL the free things they threw out. The free stuff did not even touch the fourth row. But it was all good in the neighborhood. I guess it's karma because we made fun of them. :(

Linda Oh said she'd marry me in a heartbeat. :) Thanks!

This is the fellow married to Brooke Fraser: Scott Ligertwood. what a last name.

Sniff. He's guitarist for Hillsong United. It's the guy on the left. The one on the right is Brooke Fraser. :D

SCOTT LIGERTWOOD! (shakes fist)

Brooke Fraser sang a new song and it was SOOOOOOOOOOOO beautiful. I don't even know what the title is. So pretty!

I am so in love with Brooke Fraser. And even more so. The God who made her. :) cuz he made me too!

Random Post

I realized that these posts reflect more of me than my actual words in real life do. So even though I look like a buffoon, I probably won't bring them down. I only remember taking down one post and that's because I was just writing in shear wrath. hohoho.

As I was writing something, I realized that I shouldn't compare two different aspects of my life. People find it annoying and I lose more and more associates. So no more comparing BIOLA to CPC. yay.

I'm going to try and make more encouraging comments instead of self-deprecating ones thanks to a friend of mine.

Oooh, and I'm gonna record another song with A Bird in the Empire! :)

On My Faith

I'm gonna take a break from the Chronicles of Spring to talk about my faith.

The reason I believe in God is because he gives me hope. If Christianity did not give me hope, I highly doubt that I'd be Christian. I'm not saying that I prioritize hope over the glorification of God or anything, I'm saying that glorifying God IS my hope. I literally have nothing else to live for. I have no ideology to follow, no relationships I hold above my relationship to God (even though it always looks like I do), and I am attached to no earthly possession.

I'm not suicidal but I would love to go to heaven, like immediately. But all according to the will of God.

Now back to hope, I need the hope that Christianity provides because I see my life as a complete failure in every aspect. I have a terrible relationship with a close friend which is nagging at me constantly, I have low self-esteem, I'm not successful, smart, or sociable. I fear so many stupid things like the opinion of others, and I just don't want to cause anybody the inconvenience of marrying someone like. I smile but I seldom mean it, and I'm a second-rate song-writer. I'm not artistic and I'm not a religious man. I do things I know I shouldn't and I'm shady. I'm a dumb hypocrite.

Looking at all these characteristics of mine, I can't hope for a better life on this earth. I just set myself up for failure. I am so comforted by the fact that despite all the terrible things that happen to me, I'll still have the capacity to genuinely be happy later on in the future.

When I think of my present, I get so depressed. When I think of my past, I get even MORE depressed. It's only when I think of my future, that I feel hope and comfort. My future in Heaven is a comforting thought. All current relationships that are going to doodoo would be reconciliated. My loserful self would become a cool smiling self. :)

I am so frustrated right now.

This is a post written in a state of anguish.

Chronicles of Spring Break: Clubbing on Thursday

I woke up at BIOLA since I didn't want to drive home tired and so I slept over at BIOLA.

I watched WCG Ultimate Gamer to see Ciji get eliminated and then called up Heffy Kim and Esther Koh. I picked them up and went to eat at Souplantation. After we ate, I dropped them off at their houses and went over to Harry Potter's house to chill with Harry Potter and Simon Chung. We lingered and ate Subway.

I then went to BIOLA to meet up with Ben Lo, Ju Kyung Cho, Leah Lee, Tiffany Chan, and Monica Tseng. We went to Hollywood Blvd. to go to a club. We parked and walked to Club Bang but it was Gothic Night so we were not allowed in. Then we went to Level 3 but the dress code was formal. So we were not allowed in. I saw where Jimmy Kimmel records his shows and there was a big movie event but we couldn't figure out what it was for. In the end, we just ended up going home without going to an actual club. :(

Chronicles of Spring Break: Irvinian Wednesday

I woke up, ate cereal, and watched a movie about the Three Kingdoms.

I departed for Oodles of Noodles to eat with Rebekah Baird, the other half of A Bird in the Empire. I ate pho with her and then we had a jam session in my truck. It was great.

Afterwards, she left and I went home to prepare for Irvine. I went to Fullerton to pick up Simon Chung. From there, I left for Irvine without a radio. I arrived and met with Daniel DK Kim. From his house, we picked up Eric Eerek Kim. Then we went to 319 where Isaac Ijack Kim and James Yea lived. We decided to go to Costco and left James behind because he had to go to work.

At Costco, we ordered and ate and the bathroom smelled like strawberry milk. It smelled so good. We left two slices of pizza and went over to Stephanie Chang's townhouse where she roomed with four other people. Or maybe it was five. At Stephanie's house, we played Cranium and my team, which consisted of myself, DK, and Ijack, got owned by the other team which consisted of Stephanie, Eerek, and Simon. Then we tried to redeem ourselves in a game of Taboo and we won by one point. Then we out to buy ice cream.

I pushed around a shopping cart with Eerek in it towards Albertsons. Then Ijack started running. So Eerek got off and I started chasing him. I ran hard and I could not keep up. So out of shape. But Ijack was intensely exercising for his bet with James Yea so I cut myself some slack. After trying to catch up to Ijack, we arrived at Albertsons. We bought strawberry icecream and milk. We ran back and I got destroyed again. I called Christine CK Kim, Jenn Chung (she's famous on Youtube), and Yoojin Ezekiel Song. Only Yoojin picked up. We talked and then I reached Stephanie's townhouse. We played a game of Texas Hold'em with a dollar buy in. Simon abstained.

Stephanie was eliminated first. Then I was eliminated on the river. Then DK, then Eerek. Then something happened where we all got our money back. It was weird. While we were playing, Stephanie's roommate came and watched us play. She had a plate of hash brown potatoes which she was eating. CK called me while I was playing and I had an extremely brief conversation with her.

After we played we left. We dropped off Ijack, then Eerek, then went back to DK's place. We left, got lost, went back, got directions, checked e-mail, took colorblind test, and left again for home. I dropped off Simon safely and went to BIOLA since I was tired. I went over to Steward to meet Ju Juicy Cho, Rui Guo, Daros Koding, and Jonathan Barker eating dinner at midnight. Then I played DOTA to finish the night off. :)

Chronicles of Spring Break: Biola Tuesday

I woke up and I ate Fruit Loops for breakfast.

Then I watched a Korean orak show and ate more meat.

Then I went over to BIOLA to pick up Leah Lee. I met her at Nate Yim's apartment because he was out on a six day hiking trip. At her apartment, I saw Monica watching a Bollywood about two Indian guys acting gay so they could live in an apartment. Then I took them both out to Panera Bread where they both bought a cheese bread. Then I took them over to BobaLoca and got shaved ice.

Then I dropped them off at Biola and I went to Souplantation to eat with Simon Chung, Harry Potter, and Jo Kim. Then we all split and I went to chill at BIOLA. I met with Rui Guo and Daros Koding in Stewart. I just played DOTA and other such games with them for a while.

Then I went over to Leah's room since she got kicked out of Nate's apartment. I just chilled there and watched a bunch of youtube clips until we got fed up with BIOLA internet shutting down on us and all.

Then I went home to find out that my home internet was down. Super sad.

Chronicles of Spring Break: UCLA on Monday

So I woke up at seven in the morning and got ready for my grand adventure. I took my father's infamous green truck which shut down in the middle of a u-turn with two passengers in it. I don't think they'll ever ride my truck again but whatever. I needed it to fit two other people from LA so I had to use it.

I drove it to Los Angeles with slight traffic and got there by nine fifteen or so. I picked up Sarah Chong, then Yoe Jin Whang. We went to eat at Jose Bernstein which is famous for it's ridiculous Kimchi Galbi Burrido. We struggled through the burrido because it was pretty heavy for a burrido. I ate the Kimchi Galbi Burrido, Sarah ate the Vegeterian Burrido, and Yoe Jin ate the Chorizo Burrido. Oh and I finally found out what in blazes Otilia was. :) After we finished we headed back on campus to return Yoe Jin to her studental duties.

After we dropped her off, I parked in front of Hedricks Hall where Sarah, DaKimi, Mimo (kinda), and Ben lives. Sarah and I went back to her dorm and played Jenga. We made the tallest stack of Jenga I had ever seen but I don't play Jenga much. Apparently, Sarah has seen taller stacks.

After we played Jenga, Sarah had to go fliering (the act of handing out fliers) so I went to meet up with Ben Park. In Ben Park's room, I found arguably the most adorable pencil case, I've ever seen in my life. After lingering in his room for a while, we went to eat at the cafeteria. I forgot what it was called. Covelle or something. I ate an hamburger, a fourth of a motza ball, and juice. Ben ate much more than I. Afterwards I met Ben's CCM homies (whose names I will not list, not because I forgot them but cuz I respect their privacy) and we talked a bit.

Afterwards, we went back to Ben's room to meet his two roommates. They were nice guys. Then we walked to Bruin walk where Sarah was fliering. There I met Andrew Han who was also fliering. Very handsome fellow. Then I met a friendly guy named Josh. Super nice. After just chilling for a while, Sarah had to go EVing (evangelizing) and Ben had to go to class. So we walked towards his class and we met up with Kirk who was ending class. So Ben handed me off to Kirk and left for CS (Counter-Strikingly Computer Science)

Then Kirk and I walked to the bus stop across a parking lot of mopeds and bumped into Kirk's roommate Daniel. He was a nice fellow. We rode the bus to Kirk's place and said bye to Daniel since he had to go somewhere and went up to Kirk's apartment. In his apartment, we watched five minutes of Dodgers vs. Giants and left for Versailles, a Cuban restaurant.

On the way there, I found out how Kirk's awesome halfbreed car works. I was admiring the efficiency of his car when we got to the restaurant. I ordered a special chicken of sorts that the restaurant was famous for and ate peacefully with Kirk. The chicken was kind of huge. I finished half and packed the rest for later. Then Kirk dropped me off in front of Hedricks Hall where I met with DaKimi.

When I was up in his room, I offered the rest of my chicken which he ate voraciously and I sat down. While resting in the room, a girl named Christina came into the room and recorded a song on DaKimi's HUGE macomputer. I was tired so I went up to his bed and her song lullabyed me into a deep slumber. It wasn't that deep but her piano playing was beautiful. After she finished, she left and I destroyed DaKimi in Halo 3. Then we went to another community room and played Wii. DaKimi destroyed me. Then another girl named Minnie came in and said something along the lines of "the perfect boyfriend doesn't play games." So sad.

Then we left since we were sad and met with Isaac Hui to eat dinner. We ate at the Hedricks cafe. I tried DaKimi's invention, the Milk Tea Ice Cream with Hazelnut. It was good. After we ate, I met with Mimo and made her feel guilty for DITCHING me. I remet Noel and met her other roommate who shall remain unnamed. :|Then DaKimi and Isaac started beat boxing. We went up to DaKimi's room pulled up Christina's song and started freestyle/beatboxing/reading scripture to it. Dakimi's roommate Daniel was in the back admiring our craziness.

Then Isaac left for homework and DaKimi ditched me for Heroes. Bum. I was walking to my car and I remembered James who facebooked me earlier saying that he was waiting for me in the morning which was a miscommunication that I'm truly sorry for. I called him and we had a nice short talk full of laughter and encouraging words. James gave me the final welcoming touch to UCLA and bid me farewell.

Afterwards, I left for home and I got lost. I aimlessly drove for about an hour before I decided to look at the map only to realize that I was going the polar opposite direction of where I was supposed to go. I fixed my mistake and got home safely.

This marks the end of the first day for my adventurous break. :)

Chronicles of Spring Break: Prologue

I went home for the first time this semester and picked up my car which would be a vital tool in my adventure.

I went home on Sunday, talked to my sister about some unfinished business over a cup of Juice It Up juice. She had Orange Mega-Blaster and I had a Lava Flow.

Afterwards, I went home and prepared for the first day of my adventures...

i am comforted.

I am comforted in a few things.
I am comforted in my future because I know God has a plan.
I am comforted in my friends because they love me.
I am comforted in my family because they'll accept me.
I am comforted in knowing that I will eventually stop being such a big jerk no matter how long that'll take.
I am comforted in the fact that I somehow make others laugh.
I am comforted in my great big indestructible safety net called God.
I am comforted in realizing that even if I push God to the side, he'll never push me aside.
I am comforted in knowing that God will always provide comfort.
I am comforted in his Word because it has so many fun stories and a life changing message.
I am comforted in knowing that even if my close relationship which is about to fall apart actually does fall apart, that God gave me the parts to survive it.
I am comforted in the fact that I have some cool friends.
I am comforted in knowing so many things about Christ and that I will eventually grow to know emotionally and spiritually more about Christ.
I am comforted in knowing that even if I use bad grammar, my friends and God love me.
I am comforted in the few amount of cash I have.
I am comforted in that even if I feel bad, I'll feel better eventually.
I am comforted in being able to write this post even though I feel tired.
I am comforted in feeling comforted even in my tiredness.
I am comforted in Michelle's encouraging comment in my tiredness post. :)
I am comforted in knowing that this is Spring Break.
I am comforted in knowing that I have a incredibly packed Monday at University of California in Los Angeles.
I am comforted in that my friends look past my Debbie Downerism and love me still.
I am comforted in that even if I have no friends to talk to, I have God and that he provided me with this blog. :)
I am comforted in that my comfort post might be longer than my tired post.
I am comforted in that even if I try filling the void inside with games, movies, and friends, that God will always be there waiting for me to do the right thing.
I am comforted in knowing that my emotionlessness is something I could work on.
I am comforted in my own stupid personality.
I am comforted in God.
I am comforted in Jesus Christ.
I am comforted in the Holy Spirit.
I am comforted in my salvation.
I am comforted in my redemption.
I am comforted in the eschatology.
I am comforted in a bunch of terms I learned in Theology class.
I am comforted in learning about you intellectually in BIOLA and CPC.
I am comforted in God's undying love for a person like me.
I am comforted.
I am.
I am comforted in knowing that God loves me no matter what I do.
Even if the world were to hate.
Even if I were to lose all my friends.
I can look forward to my death bed which would be in an undetermined number of years and know that I will be with Christ.
I am so tired.
But I am comforted.
God.
How You Love Me So.

i am tired.

I am tired of so many things.
I am tired of being such a big jerk that my friend has to constantly keep me in check.
I am tired of the fact that he's been doing so for about a year.
I am tired of having no hope in the kids I teach in church.
I am tired of my own emotionless face which makes it hard for people to know my true emotions.
I am tired of being a great big joke.
I am tired of being a debbie downer.
I am tired of blogging about depressing things.
I am tired of one of my closest friendships being severely flawed and at the brink of destruction.
I am tired of caring so much about what others think about me.
I am tired of not wanting to go home because my home is a place of great despair.
I am tired of being homesick for heaven.
I am tired of my own stupid personality.
I am tired of coveting the social skills of others.
I am tired of being so exhausted all the time.
I am tired of relying on myself.
I am tired of being stupid.
I am tired of trying to be clever.
I am tired of having no one to talk to.
I am tired of not accepting the help of those who want to talk to me.
I am tired of knowing so much about God but being a pathetically infantile Christian.
I am tired of friends who chill.
I am tired of feeling bad.
I am tired of trying fill the empty void inside with games, movies, and friends.
I am tired of wanting to think that I don't need friends yet relying on friends for comfort.
I am tired of all the drama.
I am tired of seeing little fob kids smoking everywhere.
I am tired of hearing of my sister.
I am tired of hearing about my family.
I am tired of my cousin.
I am tired of CPC.
I am tired of Biola.
I am tired of myself.
I am tired.
I am.
I am tired of thinking in my sin that I don't need or want God.
At the end of the day.
I know.
I only have Him.
I wish I could fastforward 20 years to my death bed and look forward to being in Heaven.
I know I'll regret a lot of things but I'll be happy that I chose to be a Christian.
I am so tired.
God.
How Great Thou Art.

Stop Caring

Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. - Theodor Seuss Geisel

Let's distinguish between those who matter from those who don't. :)

The Manly Month of March Conclusion

Complete and utter failure.